For the first time in krho history, 4 brothers embarked upon
a journey – no… a quest, to find the most bumpin clubs, well-tanned and
hard-bodied women, and of course an endless flow of alcohol in foreign
territory. And find it we did, in HAWAII
BABY!
September 26, 2006.
David kim, Kevin kim, Jason lee, and I arrive at San
Francisco international airport at 7:03 am. We all
figured that we should start out the trip right with a hearty and healthy
breakfast at the airport grill/bar.
Jason and I in were particularly feeling the excitement in the air as no
one in the group had been off the mainland in a long long time. So… we decided to get the party started a
little bit early.
A beer at 740 am. Can
we say alcoholic?
 starting the day with a smile of course...
We got on the plane and of course david made it so that him
Jason and Kevin sit together and I sat somewhere else. Asshole…
I immediately turned on “lonely” by Akon on my ipod and took out my
laptop so that Michael Scott and the workers at the dunder Mifflin paper
company in Scranton (it’s the company in the tv show “the office” for those who
don’t know) could keep me company during the 4 hour ride to oahu.
We touched down in oahu 1pm
which is 10am Hawaii time. We didn’t
really feel any difference until we got our first whiff of the air outside of
the airport. I felt like I was in the
depths of a sweaty armpit cuz it was so damned humid, making it hard to
breathe. We finally got to our hotel,
the Waikiki banyan, but it was still too early to check in so we left our bags
there and decided to walk around a bit.
Now if you’ve been to Waikiki/oahu, you’ll know that there’s an ABC
store on every friggin corner. There was
an ABC store on every block. No
joke. And the funny thing was there were
different kinds and you could tell what kind of store it was going to be based
on the font in the front.
ABC STORE – your run of the
mill convenience store with the décor of a typical store.
ABC Store – the high-class store with fancy little decorations and has
the hint of an aura of snootiness. Bums
may not enter.
ABC STORE – very
jungle/island feel. They’ve got lots of
bamboo and wicker stuff w/ tiki torches burning up front.
After we walked around, we decided to hit up the beach w/
our greek-god like bodies. When we were
walking there, I expected to see a beach full of slim tanned bodies. Instead I was blinded by a sea of pasty white
Japanese tourists who were fobbed out to the max. I think we were some of the tan minority,
except for Jason, who fit right in w/ his rockin wifebeater tan. The highlight of the beach for that day was
not seeing girls or whatever, but it was when a wave hit Jason and he flipped
over w/ his legs spread eagle over his head like a pornstar about to receive
the grand finale. Kevin and I were
laughing for 10 minutes straight.
Arguably one of the funniest moments of the trip.
We finally got to check in and we were very pleased with our
room. Full w/ kitchen w/ pots and pans
and silverware. And we get a letter on
the counter addressed to “Mr. and Mres. Kim”
the reason? Dave had signed us up
for the honeymoon suite because it had a better view and a free bottle of
champagne for only 15$ more. And on the
reservation the names were david and Kevin kim (they have the same last name)
and so I think they just assumed we were a gay couple. Even though everyone thought we were gay cuz
there were 4 dudes in a honeymoon suite, we got a nice view and a free bottle
of bubbly so it was all good for me.
 we love our bubbly!!
Next to do: grocery shopping. Purchases:
48 eggs
tobasco
sauce
two variety
packs of sandwich meat
two bags of
sliced wheat bread
mayo,
mustard
6 cans of
spam
1 bag of
rice
1 handle of
jose cuervo tequila
1 handle of
skyy vodka
two bottles
of pepsi.
As you can see we are very concerned with eating healthy
foods low in cholesterol and sodium.
You’re not supposed to eat more than 2-4 eggs a week or something. We ate 12 each in 5 days. I think my cholesterol level went through the
roof after the trip.
We drank and went clubbing every night. I’m sorry liver… don’t die on me.
 i HATE tequila now.
 jason hates tequila too. lol.
In Hawaii,
you’d think that the scenery, nightlife, and girls would be the highlight of
the trip, but it wasn’t. Hawaii
introduced us to the joy of the moped!
You can’t go faster than 40mph, but it feels like you’re going 80. once we got our mopeds, we transformed from
regular tourists into the ultimate moped gang.
RECOGNIZE FOO!
I can’t forget those drunken nights when we’d go mopeding
for hours, racing, and honking at everyone.
Did you know mopeds get over 100 miles per gallon? I thought that was
insane. INSANE!
So one night we were mopeding around, and we happened to
have come upon this place called “Everwood Relaxation.” Me and dave thought we’d drop by and see what
was going on there cuz we were pretty sore from all the luggage lifting
exercises. We knock on the door and this
old, dirty looking asian lady with mountains of make up opens the door and
tells us to come in. we go through a
narrow hallway and mind you it’s 3am
right now, and all of these girls start coming out. I look around and I see an empty room with a
bed, a tv, and a chair. So now I’m
thinking this isn’t just a regular relaxation place, when this girl comes up to
us and this is the verbal exchange that ensued.
A scantily dressed
girl enters the room.
Girl: hey guys.
Staying the night?
Both phil and dave
stiffen.
Dave: we were just wondering what goes on here.
Girl: bullshit…
Phil and dave exchange
nervous glances
Girl: well I’ll break it down for you. I’m as good as it gets here. One of the girls is really dark, the other
one is fat, or you can have the madam that opened the door.
Phil mentally vomits
at the thought
Phil: how much is it for a massage?
Girl: it’s 100$ for a massage (the girl winks)
Phil: um… we gotta go. Sorry for wasting your time.
Phew~ what an
adventure. If only I was single…
puhaha. Jp. I don’t think I’m into the
whole paying for pleasure thing. ANYWAY
I got pretty toasted during the trip. My thighs were so white and my arms were so
dark that when juxtaposed, it cannot help but baffle the mind. Observe.
I guess it’s fitting because we decided that the motto of
our trip would be “let it burn!”
Alright here’s some random pics. I’m tired of writing. 
kevin and jason love being gay with eachother.
lathering eachother up... and CAUGHT IN THE ACT!!! hahahaha.
Kevin on his first of 20 sandwiches.
Our view from the honeymoon suite baby!!
Soooo healthy....
I wonder when plaid pants are gonna go out of style...?
i was trying to be all artsy fartsy, so here are a series of pensive pictures.
     
we're all so brown...
look ma! a giraffe!!
dude this rhino was pissing for literally 3 minutes and with such brute force...
this turtle is seven times older than me! 150! it was huuuge.
so sophisticated. i think this was the night i yakked afterward.
Good bye Hawaii!!!
this is how we worked out while we were in hawaii.
so sad to be leaving....=(
   | 
), i am writing a real one. it's about 7 months worth of stuff so i just decided to include high lights. 
